These moments in leadership. You’ve probably lived them. Something’s not quite right.
You see a dip in someone’s performance.
A tone that feels different.
See a small behaviour shift you can sense even if it’s hard to name.
Instead of turning toward it, you keep going.
You tell yourself they are just having a rough week.
You hope the issue will settle down.
You carry on because stopping feels heavy and maybe even risky.
I have done this too.
And whatever you think, it’s not laziness or even avoidance.
It’s actually a form of self-preservation.
When you are already holding the weight of projects, people, expectations, family, and whatever is in the background for you, one more fire feels like the thing that might push everything over the edge.
But here’s what I’ve been reflecting on.
When we look away, even gently, something else happens.
We unintentionally invite others to look away as well.
We teach them to pretend things are fine.
And sometimes that’s because turning towards the fire means turning toward ourselves.
For the leaders I work with, this deeper truth is familiar.
It’s rarely about the immediate issue.
It’s the fear that if they address it, they might reveal their own exhaustion or deep frustration.
Or even the worry that they’ve drifted too far from the leader they want to be.
Keeping the peace means they can hold everything together a little longer.
Familiar?
That moment when you sense something is off, yet you hesitate. Because you’re stretched thin and craving steadiness.
What I see is this:
Turning toward the fire does not make you weaker.
It brings you back into presence.
It reconnects you with the impact you still want to make.
And reminds the people around you that honesty and clarity are acts of care, not conflict.
Often, that small moment of courage becomes the beginning of a quiet return.
To integrity and steadiness. And to yourself.
The belief that small issues fix themselves is comforting, but rarely true. Presence is what restores things, not distance.
Photo by Elisa Ventur on Unsplash