Category Archives for presence
“I don’t know what I want”
“I don’t know what I want.”I hear this more often than you might imagine.And it’s rarely the whole story.Usually, the person saying it does know something.He knows he doesn’t want the next decade to feel like a repeat of the last one.He knows the old ambition has lost some of its charge.He knows another role, […]
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A plan is not a direction
Successful men are often very good at making plans.That’s part of the problem.A plan gives you something to work on.It feels responsible.It creates the sense that you are addressing the issue.So when life starts to feel flat, restless or strangely underwhelming, the instinct is familiar.Make a plan. Like…A retirement plan.A portfolio plan.A financial plan.A transition […]
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The permission you’re waiting for will never come
If you’re successful, there is a point when you’ll probably realise nobody is coming to give you permission.Not the board or your business partner.Nor your wife or your kids.Certainly not your financial adviserIt won’t be the younger version of yourself who set the whole thing in motion twenty or thirty years ago.For years, permission can […]
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When the meeting stops reaching you
The fly head-butting the window draws more curiosity than the conversation.You’re sitting in a meeting you would once have found interesting..The people around you are capable.The topic’s important.The numbers matter.Someone’s talking through the next phase, the next challenge, the next decision that needs making.And you are contributing.You’ll ask the right question.Make the useful observation.You’ll help […]
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The new role that changes nothing
A new role can be a very convincing distraction.It gives you something to announce.Something to plan, to explain.It looks (and probably feels) like movement.And for a while, it may even feel better.You’ll encounter new people. Tackle new problems.You’ll achieve new status.There’ll be new terminology or language and culture to master.But if the deeper issue is […]
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Who are you without your role?
One of the hardest questions for a successful man to answer is this…Who am I without my role?For decades, your role gives shape to everything.It tells you where to be. What to solve. Who needs you.It informs you about what matters this week. It shapes what success looks like.It also gives you status, structure, income, […]
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The life that once felt like freedom
One of the more uncomfortable truths about success is that it can become harder to question once it has worked.The business, the career, income, identity all worked.The house, the holidays, the status, the choices, the security. They all came from years of intelligent and focused effort.So when a man starts to feel trapped inside the […]
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The question you avoid never stays private
The question you avoid privately does not stay private, even if you believe it does.It enters the room. It creeps into your marriage.It filters into your Sunday mood.It grips you and determines the way you respond when someone asks an ordinary question at the wrong moment.Many successful men think they are protecting their loved ones […]
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When endurance becomes a trap
Being good at endurance can become a problem.Especially if it has been rewarded for decades.You can handle pressure. Sit with discomfort.I imagine you’re the one who can keep going when other people would have stopped.You can definitely lead through uncertainty. And make hard things look manageable.That ability probably helped build your career.It may have helped […]
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What if retirement isn’t the answer?
A lot of successful men talk about planning for retirement as if it will solve the question.The end of pressure.They imagine the clear diary. Slower mornings. They dream of travel. Golf. Time with family.And of course, some of that may be welcome.But retirement does not automatically create meaning.It only removes structure.And if the deeper issue […]
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