Category Archives for presence
Why success leaves leaders feeling empty
He’d built everything. The title. The respect. The financial security. And he still felt hollow.We sat down a few months ago, and he said “I’ve spent years getting here. But why can’t I stand it anymore?”It’s a question I hear more than you’d think. From successful leaders, years into successful careers, feeling like something essential […]
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To the man who keeps telling himself he should be grateful
You probably are.That is the part many people misunderstand.You are grateful for the career. And the income.You are definitely grateful for the family, the house, the choices, the security, and the chances life has given you.You know you’ve done well. That many people would trade places with you.You might be thinking that your problems are […]
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Most successful men don’t fail in the second half of life
They keep going.And that is the problem.Your diary stays full. Your reputation stays intact. Your income keeps arriving. People still come to you for answers.From the outside, nothing looks broken.But you know the private version.You wake at 3am and your mind starts running.Work. Money. Retirement. The children leaving home. The future. The question you have avoided because it feels inconvenient.“Is this still actually […]
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The hidden cost of being the capable one
I think there is a particular type of burden that comes with being the man everyone relies on.You become good at handling things. You’re the one people turn to when the hard thing needs to be done, whether it’s the difficult conversation or the financial decision. Maybe it’s a team issue. Or a family responsibility. Or […]
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I reckon the most dangerous phrase you can say in life is ‘I should be happier than I am.’
Sure, it sounds small. The kind of thing you want to say quietly. Something you might not even dare say to your wife on a Sunday evening even though she senses it already. But what is that question actually saying.It’s saying: probably by every measure that matters, my life is working. The income. The title. […]
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I gave up 16 weekends in two years and never once resented a single one of them
For many years, my attitude to performance was ‘head down, push on through.’It got results, of a kind.But there was a version of it that felt like dragging myself through concrete. Late nights or weekend on work that after a while I felt nothing about, ticking boxes rather than coming alive in any of it.Then […]
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Want to know if you’re living your values?
I suggest you don’t bother checking your intentions. Check your calendar instead.Because your calendar doesn’t tell you who you want to be. It tells you who you actually are being. In my experience, that distinction is really worth sitting with.If you can spend a bit of time reflecting on this distinction, there are three things […]
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You’re executing brilliantly on a life that doesn’t excite you
Most high achievers are extraordinary at setting goals. Almost none of them has a clear picture of who they want to be when the goals are reached.If I ask a senior tech leader for their five-year product roadmap and they’ll give me one without hesitation. If ask them what they want their life to look […]
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How many times can you say ‘next year’ before it becomes never?
The other day, I caught myself doing it again.”Next year, I’ll finally make that change.””Next year, when things settle down.””Next year, when the timing is better.”But in reality, next year never arrives the way you imagine. Because what you’re really saying is, I’m not ready to face this yet.Every time you push something meaningful into […]
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Are you winning at work but losing at home?
Long days; big wins; recognition; reward. It leaves you feeling good about your work life.Home? Not so much.It’s hard to switch off. You half listen to conversations. It’s like watching a movie of home life, rather than being fully present in it.You wonder if this is the price you have to pay for career success.Being […]
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