The Unseen Struggle of Driven (Tech) Dads

Gary closed the door to the bathroom, turned the lock and looked at himself in the mirror. He didn’t like what he saw. Tiredness. Anger. Shame. The beginnings of a haunted look. The cold water from the tap jolted his senses. He scooped it up in his hands and splashed it on to this face. He hoped the iciness would wake him up […]

Why dreams matter

I was in the beautiful city of Vancouver when it dawned on me.  It was a beautiful autumn day. I was on the campus of the University of British Columbia.  In the cold clear light of day, I saw something new.  My breath slowed. I felt the freshening October air on my face.   An energy surge […]

How do you keep your head when others are losing theirs?

Picture this. You’re about to play your favourite sport. Let’s say it’s a tennis match, for the sake of this post. You’re about to step on to the court, when someone comes up and says you’ve been selected for a special competition. The winner of this match will get £1 million. How does knowing that affect your […]

Are you secretly blaming yourself?

This was another meeting that confirmed Ed’s opinion. As daylight faded and they all sat tensely around the table, she cut across him again. He felt his stomach clench. Why was it that whenever he expressed an opinion of value, she immediately dismissed it and turned to her  favourites? He stared into the half-drunk glass of […]

Fear getting it wrong? Here’s something that can help

This is pretty common, right? You have an impetus or drive to dive into something new. Maybe you’ve taken on a new role. Or you’re learning a new skill.  But you’re scared… Of messing upBeing made to look foolishGetting rejectedNot doing as well as othersBeing uncomfortableGetting in over your headLosing credibilityLosing something else you value (eg time)I’m sure […]

Can’t get out of the starting blocks? Try this…

The deadline is looming. It’s a big one, and it’s starting to play on your mind. But still, you can’t get moving on the task. You open your laptop or place yourself where you need to be, and crickets. Your phone is close by so you pick it up and start idly flicking through your feed. Then, you […]

How to Banish Imposter Syndrome for Good

You’ve done brilliantly in your career so far. Had plaudits, promotions, payrises. And yet, there’s this lingering feeling ‘I might be found out.’ Or perhaps you’ve done really well, but had a knock back and it’s shaken your confidence about really ‘deserving’ the position you’re in. You know how it goes. You start thinking… ‘What if I can’t show […]

Are you always looking over your shoulder?

It’s really normal to evaluate yourself against others. To start exploring the question, ‘how am I doing compared to my peers?’ It may be where they have got to materially. Or in terms of status. Or their family / relationship situation. I was reflecting on this today with my wife. I was comparing myself to my friends. […]

This little shift can make an enormous difference to high performance

Can you tell when you are swimming with the tide of your life / work / relationships? For many years, my attitude to performance and achievement was, ‘head down, push on through.’ It helped me (or at least I thought it did) create a lot of success first in my career as an employee, then as a  […]

Do you hold back from promoting yourself and your value?

If life and work, were complete meritocracies, then we’d never sweat about whether we’re getting recognised and rewarded for what we do. But as most of us have found out, it isn’t always the best person who gets noticed or promoted, it’s sometimes the person who’s done a great job promoting themselves. If you sometimes secretly seethe […]